Life Management Skills by Baby: Tip #63 Furniture and Other Edibles

Use subtle hints to let your grown-up know you’re ready to start solids.

Milkaholic

Dear sweet Baby has a problem.    He is a milkaholic.

He loves the bottle.
LOVES the bottle.

He starts first thing in the morning, right when he wakes up as a matter of fact, and he just keeps on going . . . ALL. . . DAY. . . LONG.    And he has it down to a science – - cry a lot and voila, another bottle.  Yes, a bad habit.  And it has come with a bad side effect.  Lots, and lots of spit-up.  but fortunately, he is what the doctor calls, “A Happy Spitter.”  And that, makes all the difference.   Or at least it’s supposed to.

Generally happy.

Or sometimes happy.

OK, maybe not so much.

OK, downright mad.  This is what we call “Angry Baby.”  Beware the wrath of Angry Baby.

I think he’ll be asking for a second opinion.

And let it be known, lest you think me the worst mama on the planet, it took Baby 3.5 seconds to make those facial expressions.  In the next 3.5 seconds he was being held and staring quite thoughtfully at the ceiling lights–pondering whether or not they had changed position since he’d stared at them two minutes ago.

The side effect of Baby’s penchant:  he’s got more wardrobe changes than a Hollywood starlet at the Oscars.

If you are a milkaholic, come hang with Baby.  He has support meetings every night- – 3:00AM.